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In casual conversations with friends or coworkers we often hear very different views about our elected leaders. Some extremely negative—especially from the ones who voted for the “other” candidate. Some positive, of course, but for most, not a lot of good feelings about the one at the top.

How can that be? After all, we live in a democracy where the ones who lead — specifically, the president and vice president — come to their positions because of our votes. We put them there!

Moreover, if you were to take the time to go back and read the transcripts of the election victory speeches of our five most recent presidents, you’d think we were about to engage in a national love fest. Each of those newly-elected presidents insisted he would be a president for all Americans, not just the ones who voted for him.

A Message from the President

In President-elect Joe Biden’s words, “I pledge to be a president who seeks not to divide, but to unify.” Virtually the same message from President-elect Trump, who insisted, “I pledge to every citizen of our land that I will be president for all Americans...” And Obama: “We have never been a collection of red states and blue states; we are, and always will be, the United States of America.” And this from President-elect George W. Bush: “I was not elected to serve one party, but to serve one nation.” And Clinton? “I ask you to join with us in creating a re-United States...”

The Failed Promise

And yet, with each successive administration the divisions among us seem only to have grown. We’re living in the era of an unprecedented political and cultural “continental divide.” So, what’s happened to us and what can we do about it? How do we become the “One Nation” that we’ve recited The Pledge of Allegiance to again?

There’s no single solution, of course. We’re a country whose citizens have many different faiths, moral compasses, cultural backgrounds and, according to the U.S. Census Bureau, where nearly 350 different languages are spoken. It’s remarkable that one flag flies over all of us! But it’s the differences and the hostility that have become so troubling in recent years, as if a virus of the spirit has infected the entire country.

The Road to Recovery

We began with a recap of what our recent presidents promised us. So, let’s remind them, and those who come after, of their pledges. Once elected to the highest office in the land, the president must remember that he or she represents all 340 million of us, not simply the ones whose votes they received.

Step 1 should entail traveling to every state in the Union, not simply “red” states or “blue” states. It means addressing gatherings, large and small, where a majority of the voters may have voted for the other candidate. This is where leadership shows up and where empathy is required. You don’t get credit for ignoring or hiding from the opposition; you get credit for acknowledging and respecting our differing views, and making the case for what you believe in and how you will seek compromise that works for the majority.

Step 2 would require a structural change in how the outcome of our presidential elections are determined. The way our elections currently get decided is not by the popular vote alone; it’s the Electoral College votes that really count. At present, every state except Maine and Nebraska has a winner-take-all policy regarding the electoral votes. Meaning whoever wins the popular vote in the state, no matter how slim the margin, that individual receives all of that state’s electoral votes.

When political pundits speak of red states and blue states, they’re referring to regions that are generally more conservative (Republican) and liberal (Democratic). A Republican voter in a heavily blue state might feel that their vote “doesn’t really matter,” because the Democrats will determine the outcome. And vice versa for the Democratic voter in a red state. Thus, those minority voters often feel disenfranchised from our democratic process. In a vibrant democracy that’s not a good thing. Thus, to better represent the will of the American people, the Electoral College votes should be apportioned according to the outcome of the popular vote. This would also encourage candidates during the campaign to make sure their message is targeted to all the voters, and not just their “base.” Sure, that would be a big change, but the need is great and the time has come, so let’s not be afraid to perfect our ever-evolving democracy.

Which brings us to Step 3 (and there are certainly many more).

Step 3 is our part in addressing this problem of divisiveness in our country. First, it requires that we show up and exercise our right, our privilege, to vote. According to the Bipartisan Policy Center’s Structural Democracy Project, since 2000 less than 30% of registered voters have voted in the primary elections. This means that the candidates we get to vote for in the general election were chosen by a small minority of voters. And those candidates are well aware of who votes in the primaries: the ones most politicized, the one with the most conviction about their views, likes and dislikes. But a government “of the people, by the people” requires that all the people participate. And that includes those of us with moderate views. Along with most basic participation in our democratic process, there’s something else of utmost importance we need to do, and that is listen with open minds to the ones with whom we disagree. Name-calling and demonizing those “others” is not how fences are mended. This is America. This land is their land, too.

Renewing the Promise

It’s not enough to say, “Well that’s just the way things are,” or “Nothing’s ever going to change.” Because things do change. But for that to happen, there must be a collective will to make change a reality, to restore a sense of national decency—and unity—to our fractured country.

About The Author

Lyle Greenfield is a man of many experiences. He’s worked in landscaping, construction, door-to-door sales, and a brewery before starting his career as a copywriter in NYC. Greenfield has served as president of the Long Island Wine Council, started a music production company in New York, is a founding member and former president of the Association of Music Producers (AMP). Greenfield is the author of several books including Uniting the States of America: A Self-Care Plan for a Wounded Nation, which was written with the goal of finding solutions for the current state of political divisiveness in our country. Learn more at lylejgreenfield.com.